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West Bengal and Bangladesh together form the historical and geographical region of Bengal, with common linguistic and ethnic backgrounds.
Besides the common cultural characteristics, different geographic regions of West Bengal have subtle as well as more pronounced variations between each other, with Darjeeling Himalayan hill region showing particularly different cultural aspect.
I knew that it would drastically reduce the pool of suitors. Lately too I felt like I was outgrowing the whole rigmarole of meeting, dating, wondering and agonizing over whether “this was it.” Why fight the opportunity my parents were offering me? But my fears and doubts about Rajiv swung from the ridiculous to the mundane.
Perhaps it would not be as torturous as I had thought. What they were exactly, I don’t recall, but I do remember that we all laughed. All they could do was give me the best chance within their power with which to take on the future. In the end, I decided to put my faith in the two people who knew me best and had only my interests at heart.
Though this goes for both partners in a marriage, it is the woman who is affected the most.I hoped my list would make it hard, if not impossible, to find someone who would meet all my criteria. And, because they were looking for a Punjabi Indian boy in any part of the world, he had to live in a place where there would be no waiting period to fulfill any immigration requirements (I had heard the horror stories of newlyweds having to wait up to seven years until their paperwork was approved). My mother worried that she had brought me up too leniently. Love seemed the aftermath of an accidental collision — of meeting the right person at the right time — and what if that never happened for me? Most importantly — and I was firm on this — they could not list my name on any matrimonial pages in Indian newspapers. She had encouraged me to study abroad, travel and live a life different from hers. She was asking me to consider the conventional institution of marriage topped off with the traditional customs of the arranged marriage. It hadn’t so far mainly because I had not been able to trust my judgment in choosing someone for myself. Perhaps, the poet’s comment was based on how he observed and analyzed the foodie temperament of Bengalis.While modernization has touched lives in Bengal in many areas including diet and lifestyle over these years, the basic attitude of Bengalis towards food has remained the same.
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Apparently he had been in my parents’ sights for a while, ever since they met him on a recent trip to India. It was a silent, cold walk to the living room.“This is Rajiv,” my father said. But after a couple of cups of coffee it did not seem so inconceivable. I was the one who would have to leave my home, my family and everyone I knew. If I went along with my parents’ choice, would I regret not having done it my way? How would I have to adjust my personality to fit someone else’s? It did not have to be deeply personal, only what we were comfortable with. Unlike a conversation, there were no interruptions. I now enjoy teasing my teenage daughter about the importance of listening to one’s parents.